Notes on Google Ads

Apologizing for Inappropriate Google ads:

Google ads are triggered by keywords on my site. This is not an exact science and apparently Google is not using its brightest employees in this particular department. One issue that I have is that if I talk about a certain cuisine from a certain continent on which the Olympics are being held (being careful here not to trigger the ads), Google assumes that my readers would therefore want to purchase a bride from that country and runs an ad showing where one could be found. Surely a company who consistently ranks itself as a perfect 10 on its own rating scale could figure a better filtering system for ads. If one talks about cuisine and ethnic cooking, why show ads that would appeal only to lonely truck drivers looking for a good time?

Another annoying ad is the one by some nut-job that wants to save your immortal soul before the earth explodes in the next few days. I am not sure what I possibly could have written for this ad to be at all appropriate, but maybe I said the word "hell" one time too many. Apparently your soul can be saved by clicking on his ad. Hey! Maybe he could partner with Google and provide an Auto Save button on his site, like Google provides on blogger. Your immortal soul could automatically be saved every few minutes.

I like having Google ads so I don't really want to get rid of them. They add a certain (insert French term here that I cannot spell but it means something like ambiance) to my site. Plus I need the four cents a day that the ads bring in order to purchase porridge for my 10 children. Ok that was a lie. I don't have 10 children.

Click here to read Google's gloating about how great their keyword targeting is. Their technology is so exact, they brag, that if you write a blog post about a cup of java coffee, their system will know that you are not talking about the computer language Java. Maybe this is an alphabetical thing. They have gotten to words related to coffee but haven't gotten around to differentiating between culinary words and people that need a date.

The last time I wrote something disparaging about Google, my blog experienced some technical difficulties. So let me apologize in advance for the problems that my blog will be experiencing and hope that they will be brief.

Unfortunately timed Google ads:

A diabetes testing meter ad ran for a while next to my post on international candy. That's the advertising equivalent of placing ads for bathroom scales in a Wendy's.

My favorite Google Ad:

Decals for your stand mixer from Flameka.com!

I think that Flameka.com's business concept may be somewhat limited however and suggest they try thinking of other cylindrical, vibrating objects they might be able to make decals for. I personally can't think of a single one.













SuperTarget Sponsorship:

Did you all see that I actually had SuperTarget sponsorship via a Google ad for about 2 minutes, sometime last week in the middle of the night? In previous editions of As the Blog World Turns I have openly suggested that they send me money for sponsorship. I, in turn, will blog about unique culinary products that they will be selling. A generic ad running for a few seconds in the middle of the night is a start I guess.

And Most Important of All:

Did you know that everytime you click on an ad, an angel gets his wings? Yeah, it's true. This is especially true for Travel Channel ads. And two drunken angels get their wings if its an Anthony Bourdain No Reservations ad.